Tag:Andre Miller
Posted on: April 15, 2009 11:36 am

Fantasy Fluke

So here I am on a Wendesday and I find myself one day away from winning my first ever fantasy basketball championship with a 210 point cushion in the championship match-up. I really didn't even want to play as I am not the biggest NBA fan to begin with and while I am an absolute fantasy football and baseball geek, I just don't have the same interest in basketball. I don't know enough about the game, the players or the stratagey behind the draft; nevertheless, the production crew needed one more manager and it was only 10 dollars to enter, so I figured why not? Everyone can beat up on my team week in and week out and then all my colleagues will like me. However, it didn't work out that way and I will be taking everyone's money. Let's take a look at my unmatched strategy which got me to this point.


Draft Preparation - I didn't even know when the season began nor did I know when our draft was but I figured I should at least try and make an effort. So, I opened my laptop, found the fantasy basketball rankings, opened a beer, put my computer on the table and caught up on the episodes of 'Eastbound and Down" that I missed. When those were over, I believe I took a nap, but I can't remember. What I do remember is never once actually reading the fantasy basketball rankings.


The Draft - On draft day, well, to be honest, I forgot that it was draft day. I couldn't tell you if the draft was in the day, at night, how many rounds there were or what pick I had. What I can tell you is that I went four-for-four in my softball game and actually hit a ball off the fence which helped make up for the ball that I dropped in center field. I think I need new cleats, I am just not as fast in them as I used to be...or is that the six pack that I drank before the game? Well either way, it's not my fault. Always blame the equipment you use and never yourself. I have learned that is the key to success in softball. Oh ya, this is what my roster ended up looking like. Thank you Auto Pilot!

Guard : Raymond Felton

Guard : Andre Miller

Guard : Chris Paul (Balllllller)

Forward : John Salmons

Forward : Boris Diaw

Forward : Rasheed Wallace

Center : Pau Gasol

I thought my team looked good, but then again, who looks at their team after the draft and says to themselves, "Man, my team is terrible." Exactly, nobody.

Setting my lineup - My key to setting my lineup was pretty much the same strategy I had for the draft. I didn't sign in to my team before the season started and I figured the computer would do a better job setting a default roster for me than my brain trying to figure out who should start on my team, especially since I tend to over analyze things, especially when I have absolutely no clue what I am talking about.

The season - Since the NBA Playoffs are so long and have so many teams, I see that as the real season and still don't understand why it has to be so long. I feel like it lasts two months...oh wait it does. Anyway, I find the regular season of the NBA extremely boring so I am sure you can guess that I payed little attention to the games and no attention to me team. As a matter of fact, I totally forgot I even had a fantasy team. I can honestly say I never made a change in my lineup and never even looked to see how my team was doing. It was not until Week 16 when I walked into work and the guy sitting next to me said, "Man, this is close." I said, "What do you mean?" And he said, "The fantasy basketball standings." At first, I didn't even know what he was talking about and then I remembered that I was in the league. I looked at the standings and saw that I was in second place in my division. I was shocked, I couldn't understand how I have even won a game. I really didn't make one move the whole season and I was in second place. I didn't know what to do, so I figured if doing nothing had gotten me that far, I might as well continue doing nothing.


The playoffs - In the playoffs, I still didn't make any changes but followed my team, because with a chance at winning some money, I was suddenly intrigued. I cruised to a victory in my match-up and when I went to check the results, I soon realized why my team was so good all year long. CHRIS PAUL IS AN ABSOLUTE BALLER, STUD, SUPERSTAR, MAN AMONG BOYS....WHATEVER YOU WANT TO CALL HIM...THE GUY SINGLE HANDEDLY HELPED MY TEAM CRUSH EVERYONE!!!! I couldn't tell you who the number one fantasy basketball player was this year, but I would be shocked if Chris Paul was not in the top three. Oh and did I mention that my opponent has Dwyane Wade who scored 55 points the other night against the Knicks. Yes, I am still winning by 210 points. Anyway, I finally made a change when I noticed that John Salmons was injured, but it didn't even matter because...well, because Chris Paul is the man.

Overview - I guess I could sit here and try to discuss why I am going to win my first fantasy basketball championship by the end of the day today and talk about how great my draft was and that none of my players had any major issues with injuries throughout the year and that I received great match-ups through out the playoffs...but what it really boils down to is that I won because of dumb luck. You know it and I know it. Maybe I should try this strategy for my football and baseball teams. Oh and one more thing...Did I mention that...CHRIS PAUL IS THE MAN!



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